Wednesday, November 17, 2010

What a ride so far...

Well, here I am, four months into being a mom myself and what a ride it's been so far. My son is very colicky/fussy so I barely have time to myself, thus my lack of postings! It's been quite a challenge. Much more so than I would have ever imagined!

I sometimes catch myself welling up with tears when I'm overwhelmed (quite often!) or having a quiet moment with my son. I miss my mom so much somedays and would give anything to have her here and well enough to help me. I especially get choked up when listening or singing lullabies...OH MY G*D that makes me miss my mom. Here I am, holding my own child, wishing that my mom was here to hold me. Have I lost it?! I desperately need comforting somedays myself!

My DH tries his best but the poor man can only do so much. My siblings have really helped. I see one sibling on a regular basis and s/he's been a great support. I also try to get out as much as I can...I've joined a mom/baby group just to have an outing. It's unbelievable how lonely and overwhelming being at home with a baby can be. I pictured it much differently (sans the colic/fussiness!). I've read/heard that the fussiness will pass and be a distant memory one day. Cannot wait. I know my son is a great little guy inside.